Unexpected Teachers
It's a bit heartbreaking that so many people post things about not trusting others, or if someone does you wrong to let them go and don't make that mistake again. This is how our good qualities get whittled away as we get older. How sad that so many think that they should fight fire with fire. Let me explain-
When someone else commits a selfish act that hurts you, you have an opportunity. You can learn the lesson of how selfish pursuits bring hurt and harm.
Or, you could do what these ridiculous memes suggest, which is to become selfish as well. It is better to gain insight and develop patience and forgiveness because it is only the thoughts of the other person with which you have contention, not the person themselves. As ordinary humans, we ALL make mistakes, and too often choose a selfish course of action rather than that which benefits everyone.
Our thoughts dictate our direction. No one makes you feel an emotion. No one. Your own focus, your own attention and lack of mental discipline create emotions. So, if you are upset because another made a selfish choice and it "hurt" you, why are you having a selfish reaction? If you love others, you WANT THEM to feel happiness. Now they've made a choice that seems to bring them some temporary satisfaction, can't you selflessly rejoice for them?
If they have taken advantage of you, like taken something from you, then ask for it back. If what they have done is beyond your means to accept their actions, then love them from a distance. But, understand that they are dealing with negative emotion. It's like a disease. If you can't at least have understanding, forgiveness, peace of mind, and compassion for them, you are now infected with their disease, too.
His Holiness The Dalai Lama once said, "If you are a Tibetan Buddhist but not a Tibetan yourself, you owe a debt of gratitude to the Chinese for invading Tibet and forcing Tibetans outside, whereby they spread the Dharma eventually to you!" Such an amazing reminder that we can't really see the course some seemingly negative things can set in motion. If you learn from those who do you harm, rejoice! They have become a treasured teacher!
Consider this advice from Mother Theresa:
People are often unreasonable, irrational, and self-centered. Forgive them anyway.
If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives. Be kind anyway.
If you are successful, you will win some unfaithful friends and some genuine enemies. Succeed anyway.
If you are honest and sincere people may deceive you. Be honest and sincere anyway.
What you spend years creating, others could destroy overnight. Create anyway.
If you find serenity and happiness, some may be jealous. Be happy anyway.
The good you do today, will often be forgotten. Do good anyway.
Give the best you have, and it will never be enough. Give your best anyway.
In the final analysis, it is between you and God. It was never between you and them anyway.
